But what I really wanted to bring up was that sometimes we don't grow out of people, books, hobbies that we want to. I mean, take for example my weird affection for the Talking Heads. I feel like at a certain point you have to grow out of them and just kinda admit that mostly they do not sing about... anything. But then months will pass and I think I'm all cured and somewhere someone will play "Psycho Killer" (qu'est-ce que c'est???) and I will helplessly be pulled back and listen to all their albums (on repeat) including a recent best of (The Name of This Band is Talking Heads) and I just can't quit!!
I once read their biography on allmusic.com and the band was described as being "all nervous energy" and I have always thought that that was incredibly appropriate and part of their appeal for me, all this frantic, youthful energy awash in some awkward art school kids. Like, wow! It's like a do-it-yourself band that happened to get really lucky.
With literature, I have always said that "East of Eden" is my favorite book (as it has been since I was fifteen), and in the years past, I've spent a good deal of time reading all other essential Steinbeck works ("The Pearl", "Cannery Row", "Of Mice and Men", "Grapes of Wrath" etc etc) but with the exception of the latter two, none of them have ever made any impressive marks on me. I passed those novellas and plays off as inessential or my own lack of appreciation or understanding of their (supposed) greatness. But rereading "East of Eden" last week, just bits and pieces of chapters, didn't hold the same grandeur. Most of the sparkle was gone. I began to see flaws previously not there. What's with all the exposition Steinbeck? Show, don't tell.
It's one of those heartbreaking things when things you used to love don't shine they like did before. I guess I'm lucky in the sense that I never read Jack Kerouac's "On the Road" as a kid and didn't have to reread it later to find that I hate it after all. Which I did when I read it as a 19 year old. The characters are careless instead of free-spirited, mean instead of naive or forgetful.
What IS wonderful, is realizing how complex and amazing children's books truly are. Case in point: I bought "A Wrinkle in Time" for my younger siblings a couple years ago and reread it, and was amazed that I was able to understand time travel concepts and the emotional/social struggles that the protagonists were facing in grade school.
Where I can't get rid of my embarrassing love for David Bryne, I find myself saddened by my inexplicable loss of Steinbeck and pages and pages of love and redemption.
As for hobbies to grow out of? I'll just quote Rufus Wainwright: "Everything it seems I like is a little big stronger, a little bit thicker, a little bit harmful for me."
Well, I am off for drinks to celebrate my friend's move to San Francisco! I am going to get lost going there, I can feel it already. The dread is in the air.
currently listening to:
Cities
Talking Heads (what else, sigh)
xoxo tiffany
1 comment:
kind of like Jodi Picoult's The Pact, which you hated.
the picture gave me WAY more than a hint of a grin. =D
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